STL All Sports

Herman "Germany" Schaefer, the old Detroit second baseman, was the finest natural comedian baseball has ever known. The stories of his countless amusing antics, his swaggering, bragging and clowning every minute of his life as a ballplayer, will remain a joy forever in baseball lore. Here are two typical stories of this baseball troubadour.

One balmy afternoon, in a game against Chicago, Germany Schaefer was sent in as a pinch-hitter. It was the ninth inning, two were out and the Tigers were one run behind. Schaefer silenced the roar of the crowd as he came to the plate. Then in a loud voice he bellowed:

"Ladies and gentlemen! Permit me to present to you, Herman Schaefer, the world's greatest batsman, who will now give you a personal demonstration of his hitting powers."

The tough Chicago crowd gave him a terrific razzing. But hardly daunted, the amazing clown belted the first pitch into the stands for a home run. Slowly and majestically, he began to circle the bases. He slid into first-got up and roared: "At the quarter, Schaefer leads by a head!" He slid into second, bounced back on his feet and roared: "At the half, the great Herman leads by a length!" He came sliding into third, brushed himself off, and bellowed: "Schaefer leads by a mile!" Then he slid home as if his life depended on it, slowly rose to his feet, walked up to the edge of the stands, faced the amused crowd and doffing his cap, roared:

"This, ladies and gentlemen, concludes Herman Schaefer's afternoon performance. The world's greatest batter thanks you, one and all!"