STL All Sports

It doesn't happen very often, but this smart businessman let himself get into the clutches of a racetrack tout and proceeded to lose a great deal of money betting on the tips the fellow gave him. The tycoon took it as long as he could but then came to his senses and quit. The tout came looking for his soft touch on the last day of the race meeting. He found him in his office trying to earn back the money he had lost.

"What do you want?" demanded the businessman. "I told you I had enough of your lousy tips on horses."

"Don't be like that," said the tout. "I came here to give you a horse that will positively get you back on your feet."

"Get out of here!" screamed the businessman.

"Look, pal," said the tout. "I only want to prove to you that I'm your friend and want to help you. You can have this horse for free. I'll give you the name, and you can make a mental bet on him."

"A mental bet?" screeched the businessman. "Out, loafer! First you make me lose all my money, now you want I should lose my mind!"