STL All Sports

It seems that a couple of neighboring towns had baseball teams which met every year. The rivalry was intense and a lot of money was bet on the outcome of the games. One year the teams were unusually well matched, and the contest came down to the home half of the ninth with the score knotted at 0-0. The first two batters went harmlessly out, but the next man really tucked into one and drove a screaming line drive towards deepest center field. Just as it was about to clear the fence to give the home team a hard-earned victory, the ball suddenly split in two. One-half kept going and disappeared over the fence. The other half hesitated in midair, then dropped into the eager and reaching hands of the visitors' center fielder.

As though at a signal, all eyes turned on the horrified umpire. That poor fellow, the only arbiter in the game, stood stockstill and as white as a sheet. The members of both teams converged on him. The fans began to spill over the rails of the stands by the hundreds. In a minute, the field was a mass of humanity, with the umpire swallowed up in the middle of it. Everybody was yelling at him to make a decision. What was it? A home run? The third out?

"I never seen such a thing," he finally said slowly. "I got to think this over."

"How much time do you need?" someone asked.

The umpire squeezed his eyes shut and tried to remember when his train was due to leave to.wn. "Tell you what," he said, "come to my hotel round seven-thirty tonight and I'll have it all figured out for you." The crowd dispersed and the umpire rushed back to his hotel, packed his bag, and made a bee-line for the station. The room clerk, however, was a home-town rooter, knew what had happened, and started telephoning.

The crowd reached the station just in time to see the umpire jump on the train. As it began to move away, he waved to the howling mob from the back platform, his face wreathed in smiles. "I got it, folks,".'-' he shouted after them. "The home team wins, 1/2 to O!"